Guest Post: Finding Rest

My dear friend Layne. Thank you for your faithfulness to this blog and to it's readers. We love your words.

My husband walked into our bedroom one afternoon to see me wrapped in my favorite blanket, earphones on, tears streaming down my face and the entire contents of a lunch meat packet in my right hand. Smothering a siggle ( #sighgiggle), he said, “Oh baby,” as he crawled into bed beside me.

The low moment came suddenly, seemingly out of nowhere, and it was undeniably to depths I had never before sunk.

I will not bore you with the gory details of the day’s happenings because it would mean nothing to you. My culminated distress was the result of exactly seven silly things and suddenly I just couldn’t take it any more.

But I will have you know, this mini drama, Grime edition, happened at the end of a “weekend-less week.”

Hubs and I are photographers and videographers so our schedule is beyond weird; I know many of you can relate. 80% of our work happens when our friends are ready to play. Weekends in the traditional sense of the word are filled with work and lots of it.

Last year we worked crazy overtime for 8 months straight-with only a few, scattered days off-and by December I felt dead, heart and soul.

The thing is, I loathe looking at my calendar and seeing my life divided into a scheduled mess of To Dos and meetings with no time to breathe in between, forever behind. But when I don’t fight for simplicity, this happens almost inevitably as if the swirl of life has a force of its own.

I find my days fill, fill, filling to the max, only to discover I’m not really living after all- I’m only busy. My hours are filled. But I'm empty. Not full.

I came into this year determined to live differently.

I had re-learned a valuable lesson I thought I already knew. Being isn’t living and more doesn’t mean better.

At my core I believe in celebrating life, in breathing deeply and rejoicing in the gifts each day brings. It was time to fight for that sort of simplicity in my every day.

So I gave myself a day off on Tuesday. I put it in my calendar on “repeat weekly” and haven’t looked back since.

Emails don’t get answered, errands don’t get run and I certainly don’t book any appointments. I am particularly lazy and feed my soul with dreaming on long walks, reading books, writing and cuddling with husband for hours on end.

In the mess of this hectic world
I will
stop and embrace gratefulness.
In the midst of bills, decisions, hard moments,
I will
stop to seek out the quiet place,
I will
hold tightly to my Tuesdays and my beloved husband,
I will
invest in my community and look for ways to honor my friends,
I will
stop and hold my husband’s hand for a few moments longer,
I will
linger in the grey of early morning and breathe in deep,
I will
be here now.

Layne lives in southern Ontario with her husband Jonathan where they have been running theirmedia company since October 2011.

She graduated from Western Kentucky University in 2005 with a Bachelor’s degree in photojournalism. She interned at newspapers in Indiana and Michigan and has volunteered for PhotogenX since 2009.

Layne co-authored “Act Here. Love Now.,” a culmination of stories, photos and practical ways to impact your own community, city and world. “Act Here. Love Now.” was a finalist in the Multicultural Non-Fiction and Current Events/Social Change categories in the 2012 Next Generation Indie Book Awards. Their business was recently featured on Wedding Chicks, one of the premiere wedding planning sites.