Letter to Carsen: 12 Months [One Year!!!]

Dearest Carsen Warner,

You woke up today and right away I sang happy birthday. You smiled, stretched, and laughed as I sang it to you three more times while I kissed your cheeks and belly. It was a special time for you and I. To relish in each other. To reminisce, if even for a moment, on this last year and all the joy you brought to our life.

Baby boy, you turned one! The first year of your life is over and in the books. I just can't believe it's been a year since you first entered the world. I still remember how undone I was the very moment I saw you. It was as if this part of me I didn't know was there burst forth and I’m not the same.

And when they put you in my arms... Carsen, there has been no better mix of happy emotions. Your daddy and I just stared at you and smiled at each other. With your one eye gooped closed, and a cone head from the labor, you were and always will be our alien pirate baby.

And now you are one! Still and forever my baby boy. But one! Carsen, we love you. You have brought so much joy, laughter and light to my life. And I cannot wait to see what these next years have in store!

Carsen, I’ve been thinking a lot about what I want you to know and learn. It’s a huge responsibility to help you walk into the man you were meant to be. There is much I want to guide you in, however for now the biggest thing I want you to know is that you are enough. This world is demanding. It is selfish and will want more from you and want to change you to benefit itself. But know that you don’t need to conform, change or measure up. YOU ARE ENOUGH. The world needs YOU Carsen, just the way God hand crafted you. You are what this world needs and it is what I will pray as I take my stand as your watchman on the wall. I will fight for this in the heavenlies. And I will tell you again and again, YOU ARE ENOUGH.

Some notables from this past month:
- You have a tooth! And it wasn't easy to get. I just hope you don't get that sick with every tooth!
- You are eating solids! After trying some here and there only for you to puke, you one day started chomping (after your tooth came in) and kept everything down! Pumpkin, apples, bananas and oatmeal thus far. It's a new game folks!
- You continue to take a few steps here and there, but I wouldn’t call you a walker yet.
- You got your first boy injury… a bloody lip. And while terrifying for us all, mom and dad kept their cool while taking care of and cuddling you.
- You’re getting good at throwing your little ball. Daddy rolls it to you, and you pick it up and throw it right back.
- You’re running around the house in your little walker like a madman. It’s awesome! It’s like a little baby bumper car.
- You regularly sleep on top of momma at night.
- You talk constantly. You have so much to say!

Happy first birthday my little love.
You are a treasure.

Love you everywhere and back, a billion times forever,
Momma